Alphabet Soup (Rant Warning)

Several months ago, I was assigned to work on a special project that involved the submission of résumés, among other things. I was more than a bit surprised to discover that the possession of a Ph.D. did not necessarily guarantee that the holder thereof knew how to write a résumé. One of the biggest problems with which I had to deal was the fact that some of the résumé-writers took it for granted that governmental and non-profit organizations knew what they were talking about. I spent several hours on the Internet trying to get the full names and/or addresses of organizations. “Schneider Children’s Hospital, NY?” You’ve got to be kidding! How about “Schneider Children’s Hospital, Long Island Jewish Medical Center, New Hyde Park, NY?” Noch besser (even better), some organizations were mentioned by acronym only. BJE?? Have you never had to submit a résumé to a non-Jewish organization in your life? Try “Board of Jewish Education of Greater New York.” And by the way, submitting a résumé full of acronyms isn’t acceptable even if the recipient can be expected to know what the acronyms mean. A résumé is supposed to be a formal, official document, not an e-mail to your boyfriend.

I found the same problem when I started posting on science fiction television message boards some years ago. The posts were full of such gems as “ROTFLMAO,” “IMHO,” and “BTW,” which turned out to mean “rolling on the floor laughing my a_ _ off,” “in my humble opinion,” and “by the way.” (This is a cordial invitation to my readers to submit as many of these “Internet abbreviations” as you can think of—I’d love to learn more of them and to share this information with my readers.)

Now I find myself in an even more interesting position as I read my way around the Jewish blogosphere. I must have been blogging for close to a year before some kind soul took pity on me and told me who RYBS was. Yes, I’d heard of Rabbi Joseph Soloveitchik, but I didn’t know his middle name (Bear in Yiddish, Dov in Hebrew). It gets worse, folks. Exactly who is included in what I gather is a “collective name” known as “Chazal?” Has anyone in “Olam HaBlog” (the world of the blog) other than me ever explained the meaning of the acronym “Nach” (N’viim/K’tuvim, Prophets/Writings)? And what should I know about Anshé Knesset HaGedolah, the Men of the Great Assembly, which I’ve never seen anyone in the J-blogosphere even bother to translate, much less describe?

Paul Shaviv, this is your last warning: So help me, if you use the acronym BAYT one more time without bothering to explain what it means, I’ll smack you upside the Bloghead. Or knock your Bloghead off. I’m kidding, obviously. But not by much. The Jewish blogosphere is not for Orthodox yeshiva graduates only. It’s full of seekers, late-learners, Baalei Teshuvah (“returnees” to Orthodox Judaism) and Jews by Choice (which, for those not familiar with that term, means those formerly known as converts to Judaism). So why is it that so much knowledge is assumed? Yes, I’ll freely admit that I’m an “am haaretz,” a Jewishly-illiterate person. But that doesn’t mean that I particularly appreciate the constant reminders of that fact. Frankly, I’m sick and tired of having my nose constantly rubbed in my own ignorance. I would very much appreciate it if those among you who were fortunate enough to have received a good Jewish education would show a little derech eretz (common courtesy) and rachmanut (compassion) to those of us who were not so lucky and explain what and/or whom you’re talking about. By failing to explain, you prevent the less learnèd from learning, and hence, you violate the rabbinic interpretation (midrash halachah, an interpretation that becomes law?) of the statement from Torah she-bi-chtav (the Written Law/Five Books of Moses/first five books of the Bible), "lifnei iver lo titen michshol, in front of a blind [rabbinic interpretation: ignorant] person, do not put a stumbling block" (Parshat Kedoshim, Leviticus, chapter 19, verse 11).